Nerds Don't Make Good Comedians
by aerogirl
Summary: Don't ask what came over me when I wrote this. Please. Okay.. the Digidestined are at a night club, and the acts pervious Yamato's band cancelled, so they try to put a makeshift show together. Humorous character death. I don't know WHAT to think of this..


Nerds Don't Make Good Comedians Disclaimer: Uhm... I don't own Digimon... I wish I did... now excuse me while I load a gun to go shoot Toei for the 02 ending which I'm still brooding over.  
  
  
  
  
Koushiro stepp onto the stage. "Uhm hi--" he cleared his throat. "Everybody... Since our acts... cancelled... I've been told to warm you up while Yamato's band rehearses."  
  
He blinked. "So... what would you get if a Patamon came to the real world?" he waited for a moment, then answered it when the crowd just gave a aggitated stare back. "Alot of things coming true. The pigs are flying!"   
  
Drum dealy in the background.  
  
He tugged at his collar since the crowd hadn't even flinched. "Uh... hwo many Candlemon does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None! They've never had to try?" the crowd continued the same stare. "Well technically if you think about it they wouldn't have to since they're already immiting their own li--"  
  
"Shut up and do something funny." A Gotsumon yelled.  
  
Izzy began to sweat. "Uh... why is it called a Biyomon? She doesn't smell bad, does she?" Izzy looked around, ducking as a RedVeggiemon chucked one of his Chili Peppers at him.  
  
Izzy was sweating mega now, looking over the angering crowd. "Oh, here's one.Why is it Greymon? It's body's orange, it's stripes are blue, and his head is brown. So why Greymon?"  
  
Izzy quickly darted to the left to avoid some rotten fruit and to the left to move from a Rock being thrown.  
  
Davis was laughing in back. Not that Izzy's jokes were funny; more over how rediculously lame they were. He stood up, moving behind a Minotarumon, and saying in a voice over his shuolder deeper than his normal one. "Get him off the stage!" he moved to behind a Gazimon. "We want our money back!" he cackled in a voice like an old woman. He moved behind Sukamon and Chuumon. "This is the worst thing I've ever seen!"  
  
"YAH!" Sukamon yelled to the stage, picking up some sludge. "This is an insult to our smarts!" he chucked it, nailing Izzy on the forehead.  
  
Izzy sweatdropped, then dodged a barage of food, rocks, and even a shoe from something. He stopped, a sparkplug hitting the sludge on his head and sticking, thrown by the Datamon.   
  
"Sparkplug... now that's a new one."  
  
The crowd laughed.   
  
"Oh, you like that kind of humor, eh? Hmm.." Izzy smirked. "We've all heard of Taichi, right? Ever catch him singing? It's like a Gekomon with a sore throat!"  
  
The crowd laughed, and Tai whipped his head around from backstage.  
  
"Then there's Sora. I believe after much analysis that her old hat was a cereal bowl with ribbons on the side. Perhaps she has an eating disorder she likes to hide by carrying a bowl secretly?"  
  
More laughter, a girl vein popping backstage.  
  
"Then there's Mimi. Ever looked in her purse? She keeps a diary in there you know. And it says everything she wants to do with-- GAH!" Izzy was tackled to the ground by a girl with pink hair, a hand slamming over his mouth.   
  
"Comedy's over. The band's ready."  
  
"No it's not." a protest from Yamato backstage.  
  
"Yes is IS." Mimi glared, yelling through clenched teeth. She dragged Izzy offstage, and soon Yamato was shoved off onto it; guitar in case and, of all strange and frightening things, in a dress, via request of Taichi.  
  
The crowd burst into laughter as the blonde turned red and groaned in defeat.  
  
Izzy soon ran across the stage, being chased by Mimi, Taichi, and Sora, still cracking jokes as he ran for his life. "Why is Taichi's name fitting? because he's ichi to get down with Ishi!" and with that he was off the stage.  
  
"Oyy...." Hikari covered her face. "We've created a monster..."  
  
Izzy ran past her now, blurting something along the lines of "Inoue(A/N: get it? I knew, Inoue) Yolei would fall for that guy working on the cables!" and Yolei was on his tail too.  
  
Matt took the diversion to attempt running offstage, but Takeru psuhed him back out, covering his face and laughing while Matt gave his younger brother the "on the way home you will be brutally murdered by me" look.  
  
A crash was heard, then a slam, a scream, and Izzy ran out from backstage yelling "It wasn't my fault!!"  
  
"What?" Takeru looked at him, giving Yamato time to dart backstage and into his dressing room, where he locked the door.  
  
"Sora just tripped on something backstage and knocked over tons of stuff."  
  
"So? On with the show." Digitamamon demanded.  
  
"seeing as how we're one member down, you'll have to wait a minute." Izzy glared. He looked back to TK. "So who's taking the reject Sailor Scout's place?"  
  
"Well maybe Matt could." Takeru joked, breaking out laughing. He wasn't exactly MOURNING Sora's loss... I'm not sure anyone was... besides Sora's transvestite bird...  
  
Izzy suddenly took off again as the people who had been chasing him before (minus Sora of course) began pursuit again.  
  
"Uh... in the meantime... how about Yolei and some exotic dancing?" Takeru took off backstage, NOT wanting to be out there then.  
  
Yolei began to offer her dance.   
  
"AHH! MY EYES!! THEY'RE SCARRED!" a Numemon shouted as she writhed.  
  
"SOMEONE GET HER OFF!" another yell from someone else.  
  
By now Digimon were wretching on the floor, but no matter who tried prompting her (without looking), she wouldn't stop.  
  
Something was heard slicing the air, and Miyako stopped.  
  
They all looked back, seeing Taichi holding a sniper rifle, having dropped the chase of Izzy.  
  
"Where's the short kid?" A Syakomon inquired. "He's out shooting vacuum commercials." Ken yelled from backstage. (A/N: you know... the dirt devil lego dude? o.o...)  
  
Lord knows what Izzy had done now, but the whole Digidestined team, minus Sora and Yolei of course, was chasing him, also minus Yamato, still locked in his dressing room.  
  
For now, the entertainment was over. Control had been lost, and the entertainers were all busy chasing Izzy, brooding angrily in their dressing rooms, or dead.  
  
But who knows. Maybe some other night the Digidestined will serve as entertainment at a night club. Only if the people viewing the acts enjoyed it of course.


End file.
